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You Are Not Crazy
You’re exhausted from over-functioning. Always managing the chaos. Always trying to keep the peace.
You feel alone. Misunderstood. Like no one sees the full story—except you.
You question yourself constantly. You wonder if you’re the problem.
You’re not.
This podcast helps you understand emotional abuse, coercive control, narcissistic relationships, and trauma bonds—so you can stop doubting yourself and start trusting what you already know.
I’m Jessica Knight, emotional abuse coach and survivor. I help people make sense of confusing, destabilizing relationship dynamics—including gaslighting, manipulation, intermittent reinforcement, and post-separation abuse.
Here, you’ll learn to recognize the patterns of narcissistic abuse, understand the psychology of trauma bonding, and rebuild your sense of clarity, stability, and self-trust.
This podcast is especially for you if you are:
• Leaving or recovering from an emotionally abusive relationship
• Navigating divorce or post-separation coercive control
• Trying to co-parent with a high-conflict or manipulative partner
• Questioning your reality after gaslighting
• Rebuilding yourself after psychological abuse
You are not crazy. Your nervous system adapted to survive something real.
This is your space to understand what happened, reclaim your truth, and heal—on your terms.
🖤 Learn more and find resources at www.emotionalabusecoach.com
Episodes
239 episodes
Emotional Whiplash, Hypervigilance, and the BPD Cycle of Abuse
How do you survive—and eventually recognize—the BPD cycle of abuse, especially when you are already exhausted, confused, and questioning yourself.In this episode, I break down the cycle as it actually unfolds in real life: The int...
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Episode 240
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20:37
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When They Say You Can’t Communicate
If you’ve ever been told you “can’t communicate” — especially by someone who constantly twists your words or refuses to take accountability — this episode will help you see what’s really happening. I break breaks down how abusers weaponize comm...
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Episode 239
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20:29
Letting Go of the Why
When you’ve been in an emotionally abusive relationship, the need for clarity can feel all-consuming. You want to know why they did what they did — why they lied, withdrew, or turned cold. You believe that if you can just understand th...
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Episode 238
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16:00
The Blame Game: A Key Tactic in the Cycle of Emotional Abuse
This episode unpacks what happens when speaking your truth gets twisted into a blame game. You finally name the pattern—gaslighting, neglect, constant eggshells—only to have the conversation hijacked. Suddenly you’re defending a mistake from ye...
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Episode 237
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9:52
When Co-Parenting Messages Make You Doubt Yourself
In this episode, I talk about a communication pattern that so many people experience in emotionally abusive and high-conflict relationships—but rarely have language for.It’s the moment when a message sounds reasonable on paper, calm in t...
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Episode 236
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21:55
How Do I Stop Second Guessing Myself After Leaving an Abusive Relationship?
After leaving an abusive relationship, it’s common to find yourself stuck in an exhausting loop of self-doubt. You replay conversations. You question your memory. You wonder if you overreacted—or if maybe it wasn’t that bad.In this episo...
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Episode 235
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18:55
The Holiday Breakdown: Why High-Conflict Co-Parenting Becomes Unbearable
This episode is about why everything feels harder, louder, and more urgent during the holidays when you’re navigating high-conflict divorce or co-parenting with a controlling or volatile person. Why situations that felt barely manageable in Oct...
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Episode 235
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26:16
When “How to Treat a Man” Teaches Women to Disappear
I unpack a viral TikTok that has been shared hundreds of thousands of times—and why its message is far more dangerous than it first appears.On the surface, the video presents itself as “relationship advice” about how women can keep men h...
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Episode 234
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50:30
Instead of Resolutions, I Do This
In this episode, I’m sharing a simple end-of-year practice I’ve returned to every year since 2017—one that has nothing to do with resolutions, goals, or fixing yourself.It started in a yoga class on New Year’s Eve, during a time when my ...
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Episode 233
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15:40
Dreading the New Year Doesn’t Mean You’re Failing
This episode is not about fresh starts, resolutions, or manifesting a better year.It’s for the people who feel heavy, uneasy, or scared as the year changes.I’m sharing honestly about what the end of the year felt like for me when ...
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Episode 232
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19:53
The Holidays, the Cycle of Abuse, and the Moment You Finally See It
The holiday season has a way of revealing what we’ve been trying to ignore. When the pressure to perform, host, or appear “happy” collides with the chaos of an emotionally abusive relationship, everything that’s been buried rises to the surface...
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Episode 231
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18:46
Why the Holidays Feel Heavy (Even When You’ve Left)
This episode explores what happens when the holidays don’t feel magical—when they instead trigger memories of tension, performance, and survival. I reflect on how November and December can awaken body memories of chaos, control, and grief, even...
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Episode 230
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25:07
Double Speak: When Coercive Control Hides Behind "Concern"
In this episode, I talk about one of the most confusing and insidious forms of manipulation survivors face in high-conflict relationships and co-parenting: Double Speak.It’s that moment when control hides behind concern — when a...
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Episode 229
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21:55
“You’re the Only One Who Has a Problem With Me”
In today’s episode, we’re unpacking a phrase almost every survivor has heard at some point: “You’re the only one who has a problem with me.”It’s one of the most subtle yet powerful forms of emotional manipulation — the kind that...
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Episode 227
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15:28
When Everything Feels Like a Misunderstanding
Abusers often hide behind confusion — denying intent, twisting reality, and framing your hurt as an overreaction. What starts as a simple disagreement turns into you questioning your memory, your emotions, and your sanity. I share h...
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Episode 226
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20:50
How to Document DARVO in Family Court
This episode builds off of last weeks where I disussed DARVO in Family Court. I cover exactly how to capture DARVO behavior in a way that lawyers, GALs, and court professionals can actually understand.You’ll learn how to:Iden...
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Episode 225
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20:53
When the Court Feels Like the Abuser: Family Court Awareness Month and the Fight for Safety
November is Family Court Awareness Month, a time to shed light on a system that too often fails to protect survivors and their children. In this episode, I explore what happens when a court system that frequently reframes abuse as “conflict,” r...
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Episode 224
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15:45
DARVO in Divorce — When the Abuser Becomes the “Victim”
If you’ve ever felt like your abuser managed to twist the truth so completely that you ended up defending yourself against their behavior — this episode is for you.Today, I’m breaking down DARVO — Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim ...
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Episode 223
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23:48
When You Become the Villain in Their Story
Not every discard looks like a dramatic blow-up. Sometimes it comes quietly — through silence, stonewalling, and indifference. That kind of ending can be even more destabilizing, because it leaves no scene to point to, only the hollow feeling t...
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Episode 222
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32:12
How Do I Stop Craving Them? And Have They Really Changed?
This week, I’m sharing a private Q&A episode usually reserved for my Patreon and Substack members. I wanted to make this one public because it speaks to something so many survivors struggle with: the pull of the trauma bond, the shame th...
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Episode 221
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25:15
Abusers Don’t See Themselves as Abusers
I explain how abusers redefine what abuse is, minimize their actions, and use comparisons to “someone worse” as a shield from accountability. I break down how they weaponize therapeutic language, flip the script so boundaries look like cruelty,...
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Episode 220
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10:16
You’re Not Crazy—You’re Trauma Bonded
Trauma bonds aren’t about shared hardship or difficult experiences. They’re cycles of abuse and relief that hook your brain and body like an addiction. That’s why it feels impossible to just “get over it.”In this episode, I break down wh...
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Episode 219
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17:51
False Accountability and the Control Behind It
Control in an abusive relationship often hides behind the illusion of change. They might say the words you’ve been waiting to hear—"I know I hurt you," "I’m working on myself"—but without real accountability, it’s not growth. ...
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Episode 218
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18:29
You Can’t Talk to Your Lawyer Like They’re Your Friend
Family court is a system that doesn’t run on empathy — and that can be one of the hardest realities for survivors to face. In this episode, I share the lessons I’ve learned about communicating with attorneys while navigating years of custody ba...
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Episode 217
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19:28
What I Learned from Loving a Narcissist (Even Though It Nearly Broke Me)
When you’re trauma bonded, wanting them isn’t about love—it’s about relief. The relief of the fight being over. The relief of feeling seen again, even for a moment. In this episode, I break down why your body can know they’re toxic and still lo...
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Episode 216
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17:30